I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
