he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
Dick very happy bro
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Randomize
