I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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