A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
Randomize
