I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize