yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
The lady at the Humaine Society gave me her nephew's number because I seem like a loving and caring person.
Does she know that each time you've adopted a new cat in the past year it's because some guy stopped fucking you and you don't want to eat your feelings?
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Randomize
