I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
are you so shy because you have an std?
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
Randomize
