Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
me + whiskey = a bad person
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
Randomize