If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
