Why is it that every time I type the word "give" my phone spells out HIV?! You know how many people i've told I want to HIV them something!
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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