I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
