so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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