So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
Randomize
