My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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