i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
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