What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
I just want nice things and good sex
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize
