Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
