Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
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