You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
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