Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
