help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
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