I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
