Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
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