You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
Alive.
So much puke
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
So vagazzling was a success
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
Randomize
