My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
two words...techno handjob
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
