1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
