I will die if light touches me.
im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
