So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Randomize
