they need to just BURY HIM!
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Randomize
