matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
Sponge bath it is.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
Randomize
