Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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