I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
