i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
he fucked my hip out of place.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
