I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize
