You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Randomize
