He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
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