Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Randomize
