it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
Randomize
