If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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