problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
