And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
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