its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Randomize
