the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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