He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
I'm at about main and main street
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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