it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Randomize
