it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
Randomize
