so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
