i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Randomize
