just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize