Three words: puerto rican gang bang
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
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