Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Randomize
